Bathroom Talk

Benjamin is a force to reckon with. We used to call him "The Perfect One". Now we just call him "Benny, Noooooooooooooo!!!"  We often ask ourselves how he is still alive. I know kids put things in their mouths, but really,  he finds everything lethal and microscopic even after I vacuum and sweep. I am constantly pulling coins, cap gun bullets, old food from gosh knows when, and nails and screws out of his mouth. I have also had to pull several glass shards out and was able to accomplish without drawing blood. The brightly colored objects found in his diapers are also fascinating to me. "Where was I when he swallowed that? And how the heck did he not choke?", are reoccurring thoughts. Inside our home this kid follows me around and doesn't give me a second to myself. So in case you were thinking, "Maybe he ate something when you were going to the bathroom", the answer is false, because when I am sitting on the pot, he is either sticking objects in the toilet in the space between the back of the seat and my glutes, or he is on the other side of the bathroom door, face planted and screaming hysterically at the top of his lungs like he is never going to see me again. Heaven forbid I shut the door on him. When I come out he immediately stops. I say "Let's go outside" and he books it to the door, and as long as he is outdoors, could care less if he ever saw me again.

He had an obsession with playing in the toilet a few months ago. We tried to always keep the lids down but then his chubby arms and fingers learned to lift it.  So maybe this is TMI but in the middle of the night when we get up to pee we don't flush the toilet for many a reason. One morning I was in my room getting dressed and I saw Benj hobble his fat butt into my bathroom. I thought I'd have a second to put on my shirt when I heard Jet screaming for me. Benj had grabbed a handful of toilet paper out of the toilet completely saturated with a night's worth of urination and was going to town sucking out the liquid like he does the water in his washcloth during his baths. I started screaming and swearing. I'd be lying if I told you that was the only time that happened. Fortunately no negative results occurred. Just a stronger immune system I suppose.

So I was giving the boys a bath the other night and I got Benjamin out first. Well, he got himself out first, like he always does. Once again, I am surprised that all his teeth are still in tact. I got him all ready for bed and then set him free and went to get Jet's pj's. Now before you gasp and cast judgement thinking I'm an irresponsible mother and left my 3 year old in the bath by himself, I always make him sing a song so I can hear him if I need to leave the room for a second. I ran down the hall and quickly came back to find  Benjamin back in the bathtub.

He can't be confined or sit still. He has not watched more than 2 minutes of TV in his life, which is a good thing I guess, but gives me no break during his waking hours. I guess there is too much out there that needs to be destroyed or eaten. He can maneuver out of most high chairs and shopping carts. I was at Target in the parking lot and Benny was strapped into the shopping cart. I turned around to grab something out of the back seat of my car, in 2 seconds he was standing balancing onto the small seat about to plummet to his death on the asphalt.

Every few days when Julius is near me and I've been on the phone, when I hang up I say to him, "That was the Sheriff's department again, they have Benny in custody. Whose turn is it to pick him up from the station?". We joke now because he is 16 months. When he is 16, we will not be joking. Maybe he will get in fights because he has anger issues because the kids at school make fun of him for drinking pee when he was younger. Whatever, he is a fighter and a beast. A beast I wouldn't mess with.

Lord willing, I will have a couple more children. If more turn out like Benjamin, then bring it on. Jet has been asking me for a baby sister. He wants to name her Nanabelle. Also he has been talking about his girlfriend from church for a couple months now but never remembers her name when we ask him. Leaving the church parking lot today he said, "I saw my girlfriend at church today and her name is Hazel." I almost cried because I thought that was so sweet. I pictured a cute little vintage dressed 3 year old girl who captured my son's affections. Then I asked him was she looked like. He said, "Poop". Thank you Jet. That made my Mother's Day, a Happy Mother's Day.

                                         "Benny, Benny, Benny can't you see?
                                          Sometimes your words just hypnotize me
                                          And I just love your flashy ways
                                          I guess that's why they broke and your so paid"

He is Alive.

He is Alive indeed. Go in Peace.

Just had  a phone convo with one of my besties Jennifer,  or (read in Forrest Gump's voice) Jenny, as I call her. I had mentioned how I almost stabbed my husband on Easter when we got in a big fight in the kitchen while I was trying to whip together a marinade, and she was all, "Uh I know, I was looking on FB at all these pictures with people and kids who were put together with smiles in their Easter clothes, and we were fighting with each other with a puking kid on the side." And I said, " Gurrrrrl, thank you, we are reality" We are the Real Housewives of Charlotte. Please Tune in Wednesday nights at 9pm. Only by Bravo. You won't be jealous.

Jenny in the middle

But really talking of the fruit of the spirit, Self Control, I never thought I would need it so much in my marriage. Especially when stopping myself from throwing jabs. Maybe because I have an older brother I grew up with who I would physically fight with when I got angry or annoyed at, that that reaction is rooted down in my system. When I get mad at my husband many a time I start to scream "Giovanni!", my brother's name. My next reaction is to cock back my fist and jack him in the kisser (I have never used that word, but i think i like it). I stop myself after he flinches because that would be so disrespectful and a total disaster if I followed through, so I usually just count, pray, slam things, swear until I calm down. I am usually called "Crazy" which gets a similar response to, "You think that's crazy? Puh-lease! I will show you crazy!" Having said this jargon, I am just claiming that nothing is ever as it should be and we need constant sanctification is every aspect of our lives. Fortunately our fights our nothing too serious these days. Easter's fight was over if he was going to eat the organic oatmeal or the gluten free oatmeal and he couldn't find either of them though they were clearly, and I mean clearly in plain sight.

OK I should just go with this nonsense. I am doing more harm than good. So next fight maybe I will just walk to get out some steam. 500 miles perhaps. Real quick though, that can't always be good. Our first year of marriage we got in a big fight in the Y parking lot and Julius walked the journey home at night and twisted his ankle in a ditch. And now the Proclaimers...

 But I would walk 500 miles
And I would walk 500 more
Just to be that man who walk a thousand miles to fall down at your door

(And yes, he fell down when he got to the door because the ankle couldn't take any more pressure)

LIVE. LAUGH. TOOT.

One day, with my mother's permission, I will share a story about her on this blog. One that I love to share in social gatherings. One to break the ice at parties. One that humiliated her, and me, and almost got Julius thinking twice about marrying me. She actually may never agree to the story, so use your wildest imagination. And yes, there may be some tooting involved. Sorry Mom.

I will share some small tidbits from today in which my life mimicked this title. My parents came over for a quick dindin before my mom and I had to leave to see October Baby(Please see my disclosure statement). We had beans for a side. It dawned on me that we eat beans all the time and I have never taught Jet the "beans beans their good for you heart" song. That must be changed. I started off with the "musical fruit" version first since I'm partial to the T word instead of F. My mother sat there and said, "I don't think kids are supposed to learn these types of things from their moms". Au contraire Mama, au contraire. I want my kids well equipped and up to date on these important things. Miraculously, two minutes after singing these songs, Jet tooted. I think he may have gotten a standing ovation from us. He was so excited he started shoveling more and more beans in his mouth. He then was a little disappointed as he was not able to produce anymore. I told him he probably would in his sleep tonight and I was sorry we all couldn't be there to hear the music.

As a  child, I used to get very upset when listening to my mom talk to her sister about colon cleanses and fiber intake and too many things along these lines. On the drive there I was telling her about this Chinese laxative tea I have. She said she would like to try some. After the movie we were standing in line for the bathroom. Her co-worker Beth was standing in line in front of her and said, "So you gonna go out and party after this?" She simply responded, "No. I'm going home to drink some Chinese tea so I can use the bathroom". And then it hit me. I am my mother. As an adult I thrive on these conversations with my girlfriends. There is nothing more exciting. What was not exciting is when it was finally my turn for the bathroom. I squatted as I do in public restrooms(and always at home). I went to stand, and I couldn't. My hip wouldn't allow me to. I started panicking. I thought I would have to crawl out of the stall. Eventually I was able to stand in pain and limp to the sink. I limped to the car, but nobody wants a sob story, so enough of this.

The drive home was filled with discussion about the movie, but also with the inevitable. Had I not sobbed out every last tear in me from the movie, I would have been crying from laughter. One thing Jan said flatually, pardon factually, "You know Martin Luther from the 1500's? Not only was he known for the Protestant Reformation but he was also known for tooting. Frequent ones. Loud ones. It's true.". And then we talked of an Italian/French movie called 'La Grande Abuffatta', one I've never seen but know that in it a man lets out a long, loud, powerful toot and then falls over dead. We got home. I ran in and grabbed her the tea.

So this is my disclosure. To be serious for a moment, the real reason I'm writing is because I want to encourage you to see October baby. I know it's no Hunger Games, but please.  Yes, at the beginning it is a bit cheesy, but then it is heart wrenching and beautiful and will have you in tears. This movie is for those pro-life, pro-choice, contemplating abortion, post abortion. If you watch it, please stay til the credits so you can see the woman tell her abortion story and how she has found healing. God loves you, and so do I. And I love your unborn baby.

So I thought this song was annoying until I had babies of my own. Now the words are truth.

                  Benny

       And the Jet

                                                         Pissed to be...
  "In My Arms"

Your baby blues
So full of wonder
Your curly cues
Your contagious smile
And as i watch
You start to grow up
All I can do is hold you tight

Knowing clouds will rage in
Storms will race in
But you will be safe in my arms
Rains will pour down
Waves will crash all around
But you will be safe in my arms

Story books are full of fairy tales
Of kings and queens and the bluest skies
My heart is torn just in knowing
You'll someday see the truth from lies

Knowing clouds will rage in
Storms will race in
But you will be safe in my arms
Rains will pour down
Waves will crash all around
But you will be safe in my arms

Castles they might crumble
Dreams may not come true
But you are never all alone
Because I will always
Always love you

Clouds will rage in
Storms will race in
But you will be safe in my arms
Rains will pour down
Waves will crash all around
But you will be safe in my arms

mani pedi

Until 2 minutes ago, I thought a man pedi was when a man got his toes done.


My toes have been in desperate need of painting for quite some time. I have had full intentions of soaking my feet, cutting the cuticles, shaping the nails and what have you, but time for things like these I just can't seem to find. Sitting on the couch at night watching a show, or "progrum" as we say, would probably be a good call, but "Downton Abbey" needs my full undivided attention. I have looked down at my toes a plethora of times and wanted to swear in anger as i glared at the chipped red polish, or "sonic bloom" if you will.

Today in my room I couldn't take it anymore and sat on the floor to get my painting underway, sans the shaping and soaking. I got one foot coated in the lovely "sonic bloom" when Jet asked me if he could paint my other foot. As I was about to say a big fat "No" I thought to myself, "Self, every other word out of your mouth is "no", C'mon girl, give the boy a chance. What's the big deal? That's what nail polish remover is for, right? Let him tap into his artistic abilities".  So I forced out a  "Of course you can". He got right to work and was very serious about this task at hand. When he was done he said, "Mommy, you look perfect. And you know what else? You look smart."

You know what they say about your second toe being longer than your big toe.

What my conscience forgot to tell me was that just like it took me forever to finally sit and do my toes, it may just take as long to fix them. I suppose when I glance down at my feet now, it may cause me to smile rather than yell profanities. "But Carey, if you have time to sit and write about this, then you surely have time to go fix your foot". You are right conscience, you are right, although you obviously haven't seen the six loads of laundry either on the floor in my room that if I enter to get the remover and polish, I will have no choice but to begin folding. Therefor I choose not to go back there.

                                          Ladies and Gentlemen, Mr. Jack Johnson with "Bubble Toes"

It's as simple as something that nobody knows that her eyes are as big

as her bubbly toes
on the feet of a queen of the hearts of the cards and her feet are all
covered with tar balls and scars
It's as common as something that nobody knows that her beauty will
follow wherever she goes
up the hill in the back of her house in the would she love me forever,
I know she could

I remember when you and me mmm how we used to be just good friends
Wouldn't give me none
But all I wanted was some
She's got a whole lot of reasons
She cant think of a single one
That can justify leaving
and he got none but he thinks he got so many problems
Man he got, too much time to waste

His dreams are like commercials
But her dreams are picture perfect and
Our dreams are so related though they're often underestimated

It's as simple as something that nobody knows that
Her eyes are as big as her bubbly toes
On the feet of the queen of the hearts of the cards
And her feet are infested with tar balls and


La da da da da da ...

#Don'tforgettofloss

 Today I took Jet to the dentist for the first time. Because of my love for teeth, I have been talking up this visit his whole life. To say he was stoked about going would be an understatement. I showed him pictures on the website of the different dentists and let him choose which one he wanted to see.


I don't have a smart phone, mainly because I don't deem it a necessity at this point in my life, so I was not uploading tweets, status updates or Instagrams(aka in this household as pictures
looked like snapped after a nuclear holocaust). But if I did, my tweets would probably go something like this:

-Been here in the waiting room at the pediatric dentist only 2 minutes and the whole place smells like a sewage waste plant. #perfecttimingBenjamin

-You are Correct. The hysterical laughter coming from inside the dentist office bathroom while I change Benjamin's diaper is because he has discovered his penis and continues to yank it. #boyswillbeboys

-Why can't I get away from the smell of poop? #stench

-Got it! I just remembered that I have a diaper full of caca poopies in my purse because OSHA requires you not throw away soiled diapers but place them in a bag and dispose of them yourself after you leave the office. #defacationismylife

-I thought Jet was just practicing some new dance moves but realized he was about to pee all over himself. Sprinted to the bathroom just in time. #cleaningpeeoffthesidesofthetoiletandfloor

-Sitting in the consult room wishing my children would stop interrupting so I could talk to the dentist about Veganism and food documentaries and ethnic hole in the wall restaurants that are the balls. #FoodMatters

-At the reception desk talking to the woman to check out when my youngest started dry heaving. Sprinted back to the consult room because I remember seeing a small white trash can in there. Poor baby got his vomit on.
#Secondsoiledbaginmypurse

Anywhosies, we got out of there safe and sound. Jet got his tokens and picked out prizes and was just beaming. While we were walking out he said, with a kick in his step, "Mommy that was so fun! Dr. Jason is AWESOME!". My cup runneth over. "I knew you would love it baby, I just knew it". When we got to the car, I noticed I parked right near a dumpster and was able to dispose of the poop and puke. Six months couldn't come sooner for Jet. Next time I won't have on a short dress in case there is as much manual labor as there was today. But honestly, that is nothing. It's the life of a mom and nothing to be exasperated over. I wouldn't trade my job for anything. #thankyouJesusfformykids

So I just browsed some photos to add on this post and I came across these that made me laugh because they look like Instagrams.

#HowImisslivinginCaliforniawhat'supwithmyface

#howhemissessurfingeveryday

#SouthernItalianskinVs.NorthernItalianskin

#myhusbandcracksmeup

#Can'tbelieveit'sbeenayear

 PS. I need to add that I don't understand a tweet. have no idea what the number symbol with unspaced words after it means

I just wrote a song. I'll call it...

California Dreaming

all the leaves are brown

and the sky is grey
I've been for a walk
on a winter's day

I'd be safe and warm
if I was in L.A
California Dreamin'
on such a winter's day

stopped into a church
I passed along the way
well, I got down on my knees
and I pretend to pray

you know the preacher likes the cold
he knows I'm gonna stay
California Dreamin'
on such a winter's day

all the leaves are brown
and the sky is grey
I've been for a walk
on a winter's day

if I didn't tell her
I could leave today
California Dreamin'
on such a winter's day



Life of Pi

I write on this rainy, gloomy Wednesday morning by my lonesome sitting staring out the window in Dilworth coffee. My husband has taken off work solely to tend to the children and give me a break. How sweet is he?(I just reminded myself of the Barefoot Contessa as she all too often says, "How easy is that?", "How good does that look?". If you are not an Ina viewer that's ok, but I encourage you to make a dish or two of hers. She has yet to let me down. But please remember, never use the amount of salt she dictates. It will leave your fingers swollen and may give you a minor stroke) But let's be honest, he had an extra day that he would lose if he didn't take off before the New Year. But let's really be honest, he is sweet, for he could be spending this day doing some kind of masculine activity by his lonesome.

Nothing really on the agenda today except I want to appease my husband. He has been getting on my case lately about not having kept records of the boys "milestones" and events and such. I thought all the pics and videos would suffice.(And P.S. I learned the hard way 3 years ago  the word "suffice" after reading it aloud to bystanders pronouncing it "suffis") But apparently those do not suffice. Benjamin started saying "Jet" the other day. Julius asked when Jet's first word was. I said, "How the beep would I know?" He says "You are the woman, you should know these things." Then I punched him in the face. Ok I'm fibbing, I didn't really answer the question that disrespectfully. But he has asked me several times since then, so we have agreed to put a journal on our blue armoire and document more from now on. But we haven't done that yet and so I write it in a public forum sharing things that probably should be kept to chuckle at in the privacy of our own home. I share my children's innocence here. So in your face Julius.

Jet is approaching 3 the end of this month. Benjamin will be 1 the day after Christmas, or Chrimus as I like to say. (If you want a laugh, have Julius sing you "Oh Chrimus Tree" in his ghetto uneducated lazy voice) Here are their present lives. Boys will be boys.

The oldest child likes discussing body parts. I was cleaning the kitchen last week when I heard Jet say out of nowhere to his father, "Daddy, is your penis large?(pause) Or humongous?"

He is into the whole "kiss it better" phase, but(pun inteneded) sometimes does not get his way, like in these recent instances:
-Yesterday morning he said, "Daddy my butt hurts, kiss it."
-He was standing naked while I was getting him dressed and he pointed less than 1 inch away from his penis and said, "Ow this hurts. Kiss it Mommy"
-He stated his  upper right molar hurt, and then opened his mouth wide for me to kiss the back of his mouth.

The boys have been bathing quite a lot recently especially after naps and before dinner because it's the only place I can keep them confined and occupied without destroying the house. Benjamin has the biggest, meatiest yet muscular tush I have ever seen. He fell out of the bath last week. He disobeyed and stood up after I told him countless times not to. He leaned over the side and face planted out of the tub. His rump and legs in the air caught on the tub. Had he broken his teeth this would not have been as humorous as it was. Lessons learned and they don't come cheap.

Every morning when Jet arises from bed he sits on my lap and our dialouge is as follows:
Me:You is
Jet: kind
Me: You is
Jet: smart
Me: You is
Jet: important
Just a little something I made up. Ok shut up, just read or watch 'The Help' if you haven't. But it warms my heart because he says it is a "Semi- Southern Drawl". I have also taught him how to talk in a thick Southern accent, he is so talented.

Benjamin has a thing for older women. He tends to have the hots for all of Jet's friend girls. Jet and Elle had a sleepover for an advent activity. Benj wanted to be wherever the little lady was. He also has a thing for Jet's friend Ivie.

I thought it was a good idea to take Jet to a Christmas concert at church for a mother and son outing. He tends to do great one on one. My mother, Jan, was singing in the choir along with hundreds of others. Every few minutes he would declare loudly, "Where's Nona?" Then he started standing in the pews. Then he started dancing in the aisles. Then he started pissing off the people trying to enjoy the music. Then he started saying loudly, "I gotta go pee pee, I gotta go pee pee!"  Needless to say we got the beep outta there after about 45 minutes. This is a situation that I would have witnessed and wanted to drag the kid out and teach him a lesson. Being the parent I acted angry but was really laughing histerically inside. Mainly because of the way I had him dressed, and how else would I expect my 2 year old to act at his bed time and having not taken a nap that day?

The only reason Jet was laughing was due to some comment dealing with farting and butts made by his male parental who was taking the picture.

We often find the camera with images snapped that we did not take. Last week we found about 40 images snapped. Although Jet had the camera in his hands, I didn't realize he knew how to turn it on and take pictures. Just a few I found, probably only funny to me.

Anywhosies, I should wrap this up and go get some final stocking stuffers for my boys. My closing statements are these, I really want to urge you to have yourself a Merry little Chrimus. Please don't forget the birth of our Savior. And also something I have been thinking recently after seeing a live nativty the other night. I am sure it was heck of a lot less glamorous then we think it to be. For anyone who has had a baby, you probably aren't just standing all pain free and fresh after having just birthed a babe. Mary's lady parts had just been throught the ringer and most likely she had cracked and bleeding nipples from a suckling babe, who was perfect so probably latched on no problem. Let's hear it for our girl!

I don't know what song I am signing off  with today. I will choose whatever song comes on next on Pandora.

Ok I kid you not, Bob Dylan and "A Hard Rain's A Gonna Fall".  How perfect is that for today's weather condition?(Ina)

"Oh, where have you been, my blue-eyed son?
Oh, where have you been, my darling young one?
I’ve stumbled on the side of twelve misty mountains
I’ve walked and I’ve crawled on six crooked highways
I’ve stepped in the middle of seven sad forests
I’ve been out in front of a dozen dead oceans
I’ve been ten thousand miles in the mouth of a graveyard
And it’s a hard, and it’s a hard, it’s a hard, and it’s a hard
And it’s a hard rain’s a-gonna fall..."

11/11/11

This date, in our home, not only means we will be remembering the Veterans that served our country well, but also it is to us, an Italian, salt and pepper haired, hottie, turning 29. Salt caused by yours truly. "Alright already woman! Enough with the birthday tributes!" Well I hear ya, but I just had to give a shout out to my faithful, loyal and patient as crap, husband, Julius Silvio Milani, born November 11, 1982 in Eugene, OR.

Ja'Rulius is his street name, and sistas, can he flow. I often remember the time we were driving back from Camp Pendleton to San Clemente and I had to ride smashed against the door in the back seat because the surf board was taking up the whole car. We had music on with no lyrics. He flowed non stop for the 25 minute drive home. No stuttering, no hesitation. It was dark and all I could see was the back of his head, and for those 25 minutes, I was riding in the back seat of a brotha's car, and I was proud. We often rap together present day riding in the car as a family. I can't compete with his skills and most times when I'm at a loss for lyrics, I revert back to the flow my  mafia sister Dawny and I wrote together in S. Fl. when we were 14, while smoking cigars and drinking O'douls.

Before Julius and I started dating, we were great friends who had a ridiculous and hysterical time together. Because we are both 50% Italian, we used to have a plan called "OPERATION RELATION".  We were going to trace back our heritages and find a link that made us somehow related. When we started dating, the plan came to a halt.

We want a lot of children, and Lord willing, I will give Julius the basketball team he desires. He is an amazing father who is constantly wrestling and fighting the boys and throwing them around. Benjamin's new name for everyday is presently Karate Benjamin. When the 3 of them are not getting out aggression, they are hiding under forts and searching for dinosaurs. Outside they catch bugs and pick things up that if I came in contact with, I would freak the freak out. While I taught Jet to stomp and smash any bug he sees, Julius has done a good job reversing this habit, and now Jet only smashes bugs with my permission. While I have a shorter fuse for tolerating whining and crap, especially by the early evening, I rest assured knowing that the little boys will be in good hands because "Daddy" will be done working soon and they will have a man and a fresh set of hands to hang with, who will show them nothing but love and patience. The other night when eating dinner, Jet was only wearing a shirt and socks and was moving from chair to chair at the table. His tush went in Julius' pasta bowl. His bare butt was then covered in a bolognese sauce and grated Parmesan. Had it been my plate,  my hand would have been covered in sauce and cheese from a nice swat to the behind. But Julius was unaffected and just moved his plate calmly to the side and dealt with it appropriately. He doesn't put up with crap either, he just is more slow to anger than this B-ya.When I tell Jet I love him, his response is, "I love Daddy." 

He has a past of bringing home living things. When we first got married, we got an ant farm and a fish tank. Then we moved to Cali. In the beginning he had to work one Saturday a month in San Diego. I take it he had time for Craigslist because every time he worked that Saturday, he would come home with a new living something, without my consent. Iguana, Chinchilla, Zebra Finches, Iguana, Kitten, oh and another Iguana. Shoot me. Nothing stayed long. We also got a puppy almost 2 years ago off Craigs list. One he really wanted. I agreed to getting it but was firm in my word when I said I was not taking care of it. Less than 24hrs. after bringing it home, it was back on Craigs. (Don't worry animal lovers and activists, he went to a good home).

I don't even know where to begin on telling you about his skills in building things. Chicken coupe, mirror, island top, end tables, piano bench, trellises, stairs and the list goes on. I mention we need something. He says he can build it. He prints out a 15% off coupon. He goes to Lowe's. Spends a few nights out in his workshop, and then bam, he presents it. I scream and sometimes pass out from being blown away. He just built a beautiful stone fire pit and benches out back. Talk about being impressed. I often catch him staring out the window into the yard, proud of his work, a little too proud.
He also is an exceptional painter and many of his artwork is on display on our walls.

I love this man because of his love for gardening and crop production. Sometimes I call him Adam from the garden of Eden. Actually I've never done that. While I appreciate flowers, my true fondness is for fruits, vegetables and herbs. What is better than having fresh, organic, home grown goodness? Since we bought this house a year and a half ago, he has planted 3 apple trees, a fig tree, a pear tree, a peach tree, a mulberry tree, a cherry tree, a pomegranate tree, kiwi, blueberry and raspberry bushes and I know I am forgetting something.  Because of my love for cooking, nothing is better than going out to the herb garden and grabbing a handful of free, fresh herbs to accompany the meal. Summer is a time of vegetables. I am presently waiting for the lettuce and other greens to make an appearance for the winter crop.

In the past, I have enjoyed when we've watched the Notebook together because his love for me is kicked up a notch for the next few days. What also does it is, "Return to Me." We watched that the other day and we are obsessed with each other presently. We keep saying things like, "Please never die". And just the other day he said, "I want to punch your freaking face in so hard right now". Ah love.

When Jet was younger and barely talking, when he would get angry or frustrated he would scream , "JULIUS!" not knowing it was his father's name. He knew it to be a word, that he learned from his mother, to yell when you were angry or frustrated. Bless my husband's heart.

He and a couple of his BFF's have "band practice" on Monday nights out in the workshop. And how creative, they call their "band", "The Workshop." Fortunately it is far away from the house where I don't have to hear the jam session. Occasionally though, I go out there and listen from outside and dance under the stars by myself holding up my lighter. I am the groupie. It makes me laugh and smile to hear them having so much fun playing music and singing. I love his loyalty to his friends. They are like brothers to him and he would do anything for them. He also has a "surf club" with those guys, and they call it JAD (Julius, Andrew, Daniel). Once again, I am so impressed by it's originality. They made T-shirts displaying "JAD".

The newest member of JAD. 

Speaking of music, Ja'Rul does a mean Ray Charles impression. While on piano, he plays the same Ray and Elton songs over and over and over again. He also plays some banjo, mandolin and whips out his harmonica sometimes while playing guitar. We have many a time recorded music together. This typically ends in a fight because I can't stay serious long enough and always end up breaking out in opera-like singing and therefore ruining the recording.

                                                       Karate praising the Lord.

Many things that start off as jokes with us, become our reality. Examples: From the start of our marriage, 6 1/2 years ago, we used to mock couples who would always call each other "babe" after any statement they said to each other. But not just a regular sounding "babe", a fast and peppy way of saying it,  like "beb". The mock became a regular part of our lingo, and for years now we constantly call each other "beb", not even in a jokingly manner. Another joke turned reality is "Boom Boom". Anytime we would see a black, loaded, tinted window, big SUV, like an Escalade, Tahoe, Suburban type, we would always say "Booom Boooom" and do a type of bounce with our bodies. We would do this because this is the bass you would expect to hear coming from the car with some form of rap/R&B playing. Well this also became reality. Julius sold his car that he loved and had the fondest of college memories in, and as of a month and a half ago, I now am the proud owner of a Boom Boom.  After we bought the big, black, loaded, tinted window Suburban, we drove home separately from the dealership. Julius got home before me. When I pulled onto our street, I put on Power 98, turned up the bass on the Bose and creeped down the street so he could hear me coming. This is now my warning I'm almost home so he could  come out and help unload the groceries.

                                 Our final pictures with "Montey" before he went on to a better home.

And just to stop myself for a minute, I just read this over. Please forgive me for talking about myself, as this is supposed to be about my lover. This is his salute and I am a selfish creep and can't keep myself out of this. Moving on.

This man pursues the Lord daily. He keeps Christ the head of our home. He gets his confidence from his Savior. I love watching him evolve more and more into a man of God. He prays with us, and for us. I pray my boys will turn out just like him. I thank God for giving me a man able to put up with me and all my junk. For sticking with me through my times of depression and insanity and never loving me any less. His love for this family is unconditional, and for that, we are BLESSED!

  Julius has Psoriasis. I have Vitiligo. We are a match made on earth.

Happy Birthday Beb! I love you muy muy mucho! Meet me in the bedroom in 5! Raar!

I'm kidding. That was to make any bystanders uncomfortable.

The song I leave with today is one of great meaning to us both. A few months back, we heard the music to "Oh Danny Boy" in church. On the drive home, we sang in opera the song from the Saved by the Bell episode where AC Sladers chameleon, Artie, dies and Jessie Spano sings at his funeral. She sings this song, with the "Oh Danny Boy" tune. Thank you and Enjoy.

 "Oh Artie boy

 the bugs, the bugs are buzzing

               There's gnats and ants, mosquito's and the fly

And they'll be bugs for breakfast, lunch and dinner

In that great chameleon banquet in the sky."